One Month Update

The question most everyone asks is, "How are you handling the two kids by yourself?" 

Well, it has been just over a month that I've been juggling Amelia and Alex.  It's definitely not easy, but it's going a lot better than I expected.  I feel like most of the time I have things under control.  Thankfully, I've been able to shower every morning and keep the house in pretty good order. 

I have also been taking the kids out 2-3 times a week for playgroup, walks, and other mommy/baby activities.  It's tough to time everything (naps, meals, nursing) just right and most of the time it doesn't work out, but I try to get them out anyways!  I've learned that there's never really an ideal situation of getting out the door, but I just suck it up and go go go!

I have moments of chaos.  It gets crazy when both Amelia and Alex need me at the same time.  One always ends up crying for a few minutes until I can get to them.  But once I get them both settled, it usually goes back to normal. 

However, in the last week, Alex has been having issues; he's been inconsolable after feedings... he just cries and cries... and cries and cries.  It's never ending.  He usually cries until he goes back to sleep, ARGH!  One day, he cried during every waking moment and I almost had a nervous breakdown, ha ha ha.  

This has been frustrating for both Amelia and I because at those times, he demands my full attention.  Poor Amelia covers her ears when Alex's crying gets really loud.  Sometimes, when she gets really frustrated with the noise, she starts screaming herself.  However, when she's in a loving mood, she tries to console "bee-bee."  She pats his back, rubs his head, and will even give him kisses when he's crying.  It's very sweet.

I just hope whatever is causing all this crying goes away soon.  I feel bad for the little guy.  I don't want him to be in pain (tummy issues?) or just be sad all the time.  It's heartbreaking.  It's also mentally and physically draining us to take care of him.

I do also surprisingly have moments of calmness.  There are some days in the afternoon when both kids are napping at the same time. This gives me about 20-30 minutes of pure relaxation and quiet. It's a breath of fresh air in my usually hectic day ;0)  I usually just sit on the couch and close my eyes.

The nights are still rough. Alex night nurses often and is up three times a night. It's super easy to just wake up and feed him. The fact that he stays up for an hour (crying) after each feeding is what's driving me crazy. I'm still only sleeping in increments of only an hour and a half to two hours. This makes getting through the day really tough.

Overall, the sleep deprivation has been the hardest aspect to deal with.  Until Alex starts sleeping more at night, which is hopefully soon, there's nothing I can really do to make things better.